How to Teach Students & Participants to Set Healthy Boundaries

At some point, we all learn that self-advocacy isn’t just about speaking up—it’s also about knowing when to say no. But setting boundaries isn’t always easy. Many students, NDIS participants, and self-advocates have been conditioned to be compliant, to say yes even when every part of them wants to say no. Maybe it’s the student who hands over their notes even though they’d rather not. Or the NDIS participant who accepts a support worker that isn’t the right fit, simply because they don’t want to upset anyone.

Boundaries are about choice. They shape the way we move through the world, defining what we will and won’t accept. And yet, many of us aren’t taught how to set them until it’s too late—until we’ve already said yes, already taken on too much, already given away parts of ourselves we didn’t want to.

So, let me ask you—on a scale from 1 to 10, how well do you set and maintain your personal boundaries?
(1 = I struggle to say no and often feel overwhelmed, 10 = I confidently set boundaries and enforce them when necessary.)

Where do you fall on that scale? Where do the people you support fall?

What Are Boundaries & Why Do They Matter?

Boundaries define what is okay and what isn’t in our personal, social, and professional lives. They help us: ✅ Protect our time, space, and emotional energy.
✅ Express our needs without fear or guilt.
✅ Build relationships based on mutual respect, not obligation.

When students and participants don’t have the tools to set clear boundaries, they may feel pressured to comply with requests that make them uncomfortable. And that’s when resentment, exhaustion, and burnout set in. Teaching boundaries isn’t just about protection—it’s about empowerment.

The Many Faces of Boundaries

1️⃣ Physical Boundaries – Who gets to be in your space? Do you like hugs, or do you prefer a wave? Do you feel comfortable with a support worker in your home, or would you rather meet in a public space?
2️⃣ Emotional Boundaries – Other people’s emotions are theirs to manage, not yours. You can care without carrying.
3️⃣ Time Boundaries – Your time is valuable. You don’t have to overextend yourself to accommodate others.
4️⃣ Communication Boundaries – Do you prefer to text instead of taking phone calls? Do you need people to respect a no-interruptions rule when you’re focusing? (Text, Don’t Call, anyone?)
5️⃣ NDIS & Support Boundaries – You can say no to services that don’t meet your needs. You can change providers, adjust services, and refuse supports that don’t align with your goals.

How to Teach Boundary-Setting in Different Settings

Boundary-setting isn’t something that magically appears when we need it. It has to be taught, practiced, and reinforced—just like any other self-advocacy skill.

For Educators:

  • Have explicit classroom discussions about boundaries, consent, and personal space.

  • Use role-playing exercises where students practice declining requests in a firm but respectful way.

  • Model boundaries yourself by setting clear expectations and respecting students’ limits.

For NDIS Participants & Supporters:

  • Create a safe space for participants to talk about what does and doesn’t feel right in their support plan.

  • Teach participants that self-advocacy includes requesting changes to their NDIS plan or support team if something isn’t working.

  • Reinforce that saying no to a support worker or service isn’t being difficult—it’s making sure their needs are met.

For Parents & Caregivers:

  • Model boundary-setting at home by allowing children to make choices about their time, space, and interactions.

  • Teach children that their “no” matters—if they don’t want a hug, that’s okay. If they need alone time, that’s okay too.

  • Encourage kids to set boundaries with peers and practice speaking up when they feel uncomfortable.

Practical Activity: Boundary Mapping

A simple but powerful way to teach boundary-setting is through Boundary Mapping. It’s about reflecting on past experiences, learning from them, and preparing for next time.

✅ Step 1: Think of a situation where you felt uncomfortable saying no.
✅ Step 2: Identify what you wished you had said or done.
✅ Step 3: Practice saying it out loud or writing it down, so next time, you’re ready.

For students and NDIS participants, this exercise builds confidence in asserting themselves in the future.

Helping Others Respect Boundaries

Setting boundaries is one thing—getting others to respect them is another. To ensure boundaries are honored: ✅ Use clear, neutral language: “I need a break now.” or “I prefer to communicate via text.”
✅ Reinforce that setting boundaries is not being difficult—it’s self-respect in action.
✅ Support self-advocates by validating their boundaries, even when others push back.

Reinforce Boundaries Through Self-Expression

One of the easiest ways to reinforce boundaries is through self-expression. The “Text, Don’t Call” collection at Neurodiversity Threads is designed for those who prefer clear communication boundaries. Whether you’re setting limits on how you engage or advocating for your needs, these designs help you assert yourself without saying a word.

🛒 Shop the ‘Text, Don’t Call’ Collection Now

Final Thoughts

Teaching students and NDIS participants how to set and maintain boundaries is one of the most valuable skills we can provide. Boundaries build confidence, reduce stress, and empower individuals to advocate for themselves in meaningful ways.

By fostering a culture that respects and reinforces boundaries, we create environments where self-advocacy thrives. Let’s make boundary-setting a lifelong skill, not an afterthought.

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